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<!— Post Tags + Location 5/18/17 —> Alcohol, Bad Behavior, Holidays, Police, Restaurant, USA |
Right | May 20, 2009
(This is early December, when most of the companies have their big night out. A visibly drunk patron needs to be asked to leave due to inebriation.)
Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but I think you’ve had enough for tonight, and I think it’s best if you call it a night.”
Customer: “What? I’m not druuunk! You’re ouuut of yoooour mind!”
(I guide the drunk customer to the door, which he immediately grabs a hold of to resist being led out of the bar.)
Customer: “I’m not leaving! You’re going to have to call the cops to get me out of here!”
Me: “Well, sir, if you take a look over at the table with the people looking very intently at us… that’s the police department’s Christmas party.”
Customer: *leaves, rather expediently*
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<!— Post Tags + Location 5/18/17 —> Fast Food, Impossible Demands, Parents/Guardians, Pranks, USA |
Right | May 20, 2009
Coworker: “Guys! There’s a car pulled in backward in the drive-thru. They’re backward!”
Backward Customer: “Hi, I just want a fish sandwich and a chocolate milkshake.”
Coworker: “I’m sorry. We don’t have those items. Is there something else I can get you?”
Backward Customer: “No, I just want a fish sandwich and a chocolate milkshake!”
Coworker: “Ma’am, do you realize you’re at [Mexican Fast Food Restaurant]? Would you like a taco?”
Backward Customer: “Okay, okay, we’re kidding! [My Name], this is your mom and [Aunt]!”
(Family are the worst customers!)
This story is part of our Backward roundup!
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<!— Post Tags + Location 5/18/17 —> Bad Behavior, Jerk, Parents/Guardians, Retail, USA |
Right | May 19, 2009
(I witnessed this interaction between a girl and her dad.)
Dad: “Are you as picky about your toilet paper as your ex-stepmom was?”
Girl: “No, not really.”
Dad: “Okay, grab one of those, then.”
(The girl reaches for a pack that’s on its side.)
Dad: “No, no, not that one. I want one that hasn’t been touched by human hands!”
Girl: “Are you saying the store employees aren’t human?”
Dad: “Well, you’ve seen them… You be the judge.”
(I had to walk off so they wouldn’t hear me laughing.)
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<!— Post Tags + Location 5/18/17 —> Editors' Choice, Fast Food, Money, USA |
Right | May 19, 2009
Customer: “…and I’d like extra tomatoes on my sandwich, please.”
Me: “All right, that’ll be [price].”
Customer: “Why is it so expensive?!”
Me: “Well, ma’am, you asked for cheese, bacon, and extra tomatoes. All those cost extra on the sandwich because they’re expensive products.”
Customer: “But your policy says that I can have it my way! Why am I being charged?!”
Me: “You can have it your way… You just have to pay for it.”
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<!— Post Tags + Location 5/18/17 —> , Impossible Demands, Tattoo Parlor, USA |
Right | May 19, 2009
(A pregnant teenage girl walks in with her mom and boyfriend.)
Customer: “Hi. Can I get my tongue pierced?”
Me: “I’m sorry, but you are pregnant, right?”
Customer: “Yeah.”
Me: “We can’t pierce anybody that’s pregnant, I’m sorry.”
Customer: “Why not?”
Me: “Well, any slight infection in your tongue could hurt your unborn child.”
Customer: “But that’s only if it gets infected, right?”
This story is part of our Yet More Dangerous Parents roundup!
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